johnmar78 wrote:
You are right, the whole world is watching me. I could do better. I am challenge the whole world.
Now,
that is one lofty goal ... This better be good
It's much more controllled and poised than the previous. No more ugly rushes but still a couple places where the tempo seems not in control (as opposed to your usage of rubato, which you generally do fine, even though it could be a bit more). Overall, it does not yet sound as if you really love the piece and get carried away by it, more like you just go through the notes carefully. Some assorted remarks:
The dynamics sound a bit flat, but that could be due to the recording so don't take it as criticism. I know well how hard it is to get your dynamic contrasts into the recording.
I wonder about your execution of the appoggiaturas in bar 2 and similar. You play them on the beat, rather slowly, with the accent on the small note, which sounds strange to me. But perhaps this is a common practive, I am not sure.
The melody in the RH should shine out a bit more, it is too soft compared to the LH (or perhaps the LH is too loud).
You have not quite got the hang of two-against-three, these occur a lot in this piece and they sound very unsure, especially the ones with the dotted note in it. You do not seem comfortable with triplets in general, maybe worth spending some time on ?
This piece clearly consists of a number of different sections and you should do more to make that apparent. Specifically, sections start at bars 12, bar 22, bar 32, 39. Always take a bit back at important moments, or when harmony, theme, or atmosphere changes. Don't play straight through it as if it's just more of the same.
Lastly, let me give you the dog's ear treatment and point out the mistakes:
- Bar 10: You don't play the C# in the LH
- Bar 15: In the middle voice you play a D# and then a D natural which should be D# too. Ugly !
- Bar 35: First chord, you play an A instead of a B, then on the 2nd beat you play E natural
instead of E# (just like in bar 15). Also, you miss the C# in the dotted third. And the dotted
triplets are not good. Frankly, I'd have started over after this bar.
- Bar 40: The top RH note should not be repated on the 2nd beat
- Bar 41: Last RH note is an A, not a G#
- Bar 43: Last RH note is missing
- Bar 45: Not sure what you do in the LH but it's not right..... And you don't play the first RH B.
- Bar 46: The LH C# is missing
- Bar 53: The top C# is missing or inaudible
- Bar 55: First top RH note is G#, not A
- Bar 57: Ditto